post-Lent

Easter Sunday marks the end of the Lenten season. Lent is a time to reflect on the 40 days Jesus spent preparing Himself for the agony of crucifixion. many people choose to give up certain comforts or take on practices that serve as a tool to keep focus in the midst of a world of distractions.

this year, i decided not to participate.

why?
...
um, i didn't feel like it.

quite frankly, i was kind of a brat about it and there wasn't anything i felt like giving up. instead, i spent a good chunk of Lent being a bummed out whiny self-pitying mess. that's right... while other people were out there reflecting on Jesus, i was whining about petty woe-is-me blahdibarf and la la la. real cool.

in light of this revelation, a few friends and i have decided that it's time to quit whining and focus on the health of our souls. ladies and gentlemen, i give you: POST-LENT!

for the the next forty days, i'm going to be doing what i probably should've been doing for the last forty days. but more than just changing a few behaviors [which i will be doing, details to follow] i hope to change the way i've been thinking and subsequently, the way i've been feeling. to help me in this endeavor, i plan on doing the following:

++ i'm giving up cellphone solitaire. i know this seems like the lamest thing to give up but if you know me or if you spend more than a few hours at a time with me, you know that cellphone solitaire is my go-to supplementary entertainment. i looked up my game statistics and did the math and i have spent over EIGHT DAYS of my life playing cellphone solitaire. pathetic, i know. in the absence of my beloved game, it looks like i'll actually have to pay attention in class and do something other than just shut my brain off whenever i don't feel sufficiently entertained. it's gonna be rough.

++ i'm gonna work-out [kinda]. again, if you know me, you know that working out is hardly a priority for me. i don't think i'll ever be able to exercise on the basis of superficial motivations. i have a weirdly awesome self-image that while fantastic on many levels, keeps me from tending to the health of my body. i dunno, i guess when you feel like you look good it's easy to feel sorta invincible. so i've enrolled in some hip-hop classes and i'm gonna try to walk greenlake [a 4.5 mile lap] at least once a week. i'm not concerned on the effect it'll have on my outward appearance but i'm hoping it does my mind and soul some good. but if my booty shrinks so much as a centimeter, i QUIT! kidding. kinda. :)

++ i'm going to read more. i have yet to finish the amazing book i started before the beginning of the quarter, partly due to the reading i had to do for school but largely due to the fact that i spend so much time watching trashy reality tv. so not only will i be reading more of that book and the countless other books on my list, but i'm going to be doing something i have neglected to do for the bulk of my educated life: do my assigned readings when they're due [gasp!]. one of the pitfalls of being such a gifted BS-er is my tendency to rely on my ability to articulate rather than on good ol' fashioned hard work. so i'm going to try a very novel thing [pun intended] and READ the things my teacher tells me to. it's a big step, believe me. oh, and i could also stand to read the Bible more often. so i'll be doing that as well. :)

beyond those bigger goals, i'm going to try focus on more than just myself and my immediate needs and issues and work on activities that will foster real growth. i'm going to have to exercise more moderation in my tv watching and my hangout times [sorry kiddos!] in order to restore some much needed balance. this includes but is not limited to actively working on my music stuff especially since it looks as if i've got a couple potential shows next month [eek!]. also, i'll be praying more. i know that's a very trite thing to aspire towards because what does that even mean really? nevertheless, i know it needs to be done and this post-Lent is all about DOING.

so if you didn't partake in the Lenten season or if you're just generally in need of some extra focus, you are more than welcome to participate with us for the next forty days until may 2nd as we [bum-ba-da-BUM!] POST-LENT [copyright jHong 2008]!
:)

graph paper

i wrote a poem on graph paper
hoping the boxes could contain my thoughts
hoping each little block
could accomplish what my will can not
like maybe my thoughts would fall in line
or at least fit in between them
like the letters that fill each
delightful little space
my thoughts might fall right in place
and make the mess that is my mind,
this chaos currently masquerading as my brain
as measured, managed and orderly as
this ordinary graph paper